I did not see this moment coming, or perhaps I was told it was coming, but I ignored the signs and the warnings. Daniel and I met when I was four years out of university; I was a late bloomer in the love department. I had been running away from marriage. I did not understand the construct and why it was so important. I was accused of withholding my mother’s joy, ‘Ijo Ayo’ she called it. Then Daniel happened, and all hell broke loose. (more…)

Recently, the Youtube sensation Adanna-David posted a photo of herself breastfeeding on Instagram. She wrote a caption chastising people who gave her an evil stare in an attempt to rebuke her actions; as with such public statements, some praised her while others disagreed with her sentiments. I recall sitting at the airport in Calabar (Nigeria) a few years ago as I observed a young mother was sat in the boarding area attempting to feed her baby. She had draped herself in an Ankara sheet as a show of modesty. As she struggled with a baby who did not enjoy the sheet, an elderly woman walked up to her and pulled the sheet off. (more…)

Do not forget that your mother was a tomato seller at Alade market
When your father was wasting his seed on Allen Avenue
She was investing in your future
She saw your future as her hope
It was the essence of her life’s work
When you reach your destination and you have arrived
Do not forget that you were built by hands that were burnt selling tomatoes in the sun (more…)

When I was confronted with the option of freezing my eggs for future use, I laughed at the idea and ignored it to be  an extreme option. I was convinced that only ‘older women’ needed that option in dire circumstances. However, I was then challenged by the statement; ‘why wait for dire circumstances before you become proactive?’. I did not have a smart retort. (more…)